"The Ties that Bind..." Part Five: Redemption Ivy collapsed back on her chair and laughed as she hadn't laughed in months, since before Zack's injury. Carmen leaned against the kitchen counter, laughing lightly, as C.S. chased the Chief enthusiastically over the kitchen, though she did clap the lid on the roasting pan as a precaution. The Chief finally took shelter at the ceiling over the cabinets. "Eeek! Ivy, keep that cat away from me!" he exclaimed. "I've never been so humiliated. Except for the time you stole my nose, Carmen!" Ivy picked up the kitten. "Aww, Chief, C.S. was just having fun." The kitten purred contentedly, keeping an eye on the Chief's hologram. "Nice to see you, Chief," she said shyly, not quite looking at him. He was wearing a pilgrim's hat today, and looked sulky. "Well. Is that it? Nice to see you? You walk out on me, you disappear for months at a time, you send only the most cryptic letters that you deliberately mail so no one can figure out where you really are, you never call, and when I finally see you again, I get attacked by that kitten and all you can say is 'Nice to see you'?! I thought you liked me! I thought we were friends! I thought maybe you wouldn't abandon me! But no, you pull a trick as mean as ..." "Chief!" Ivy said, interrupting. "What?" "I'm sorry, Chief," she said quietly, looking at C.S., who was trying to wriggle out of her arms to go after the Chief again. "I'm sorry I didn't write earlier, I'm sorry I didn't write more, I'm sorry I never called. I'm glad to see you, I really did miss you, and I'm glad you're not spending Thanksgiving alone." "Oh," he said, eying the kitten warily. She jumped out of Ivy's arms and crouched, watching the Chief, just waiting. "When did you get a cat, Ivy? "One of my students gave her to me," Ivy said, looking up, eyes suspiciously damp. "Zack's not here - is he, Carmen?" She wasn't sure what Carmen might have tried. Carmen shook her head. "Not that I know of, Ivy. Just you, me and the Chief." She finished stuffing the turkey and put it in the oven. "I didn't think you wanted to spend Thanksgiving alone, and I knew I didn't ..." "And what did you do to your hair? Ivy, I'm beginning to think the rumors you flipped out are accurate," the Chief went on. "You know, I was wanting to ask you about those," Ivy said, seizing on the chance to change the subject. "Uh ... well ..." "What rumors?" Carmen asked, interested. She did, now that she thought about it, recall hearing something about Paris ... which was why she'd searched there first. Ivy smiled crookedly. "Oh, there seem to be all sorts of rumors flying around about my disappearance. Is Acme that dull these days?" The Chief swallowed hard, looking at the kitten. "Uh, well, Ivy, see, everyone was wondering where you were, and Zack wasn't really in any shape to tell them, and why is she staring at me like that?" "You started it, didn't you? She wants to play." "Uh, well ... yes ... and it sorta got out of hand ... I mean I didn't start the one about Jamaica or Easter Island ..." Carmen's eyebrow shot up. "Jamaica? Easter Island?" "Chief, what am I going to do with you?" Ivy groaned. "You can come back and tell everybody it's not true!" he exclaimed, brightening. "And neither is the thing about the aliens or the Japanese religious retreat! And once you're back, nobody will start them again!" "You got yourself into this, Chief, you can get yourself out." Carmen sat down at the table. "There isn't going to be any dinner around here until someone tells me what is going on! Jamaica, Easter Island, aliens, religious retreats ... it all sounds quite interesting." C.S. yowled irritably, watching the Chief's hologram. Ivy put her hand over her face; the problem with being a fair-skinned redhead is that blushes show very easily, even with a tan. "Carmen, this has turned into a joke. I try to leave Acme to spare it any more scandal, and they invent weird stories about me." She shook her head. "What the Chief means is that somehow he started a story that my disappearance was because I secretly eloped with someone. I'm not sure where the rest of them came from..." Carmen's jaw dropped. "Chief, you didn't!" she exclaimed. "Um, well, see ... one of the detectives was wondering why you weren't around seeing as you're always there and everything, and I had to come up with something to tell him ... and I finally told him you'd secretly gotten married and were on a honeymoon in Paris!" "Chief!" Ivy protested. "I'm never going to live this down." Carmen grinned. "I don't know, Ivy, it might invigorate your social life." "You mean I'm allowed one?" Ivy mused thoughtfully, grinning. "OK, Chief, where else am I supposed to have gone?" "Er, well ... London, Cairo, Montreal, Edinburgh, New York, an ostrich farm in Australia ... " Carmen and Ivy both broke up laughing; neither of them could speak for several minutes. "An ostrich farm," Ivy gasped, setting them off again. "Ivy, I never knew you had such a romantic streak," Carmen finally gasped out. "Retiring to the country!" That set Ivy off again. C.S. meowed, decided everyone was crazy, and spotted a balled-up piece of paper on the floor; that indicated an all-out attack, distracting her from the Chief. "What's this about aliens, Chief?" Carmen asked a few minutes later, when Ivy had recovered and was drinking water. "Oh, well, I didn't have anything to do with that one, really I didn't. But there's this one detective, after your time Carmen, who, well, he thinks he's our Mulder, and ... I don't know how he got it in his head Ivy was off investigating alien technology and hunting down supernatural phenomena." The Chief floated warily down from the ceiling. Ivy shook her head. "Carmen, you must be slacking off; there isn't enough work at Acme." "Slacking off? Do you have idea how much effort it takes to run those heists? The planning? Just running those heists as you was exhausting." "I was wondering about that ... why did you find it necessary to steal all that as Ivy?" the Chief demanded. Carmen shrugged. "I had to flush her out of hiding somehow; dressing up as me to trick Zack and Derry into catching me dressed as you was a nice touch, though, Ivy." Ivy shook her head. "Why, Carmen? From what you said, you were having better success with your heists after I left." She shrugged, not quite looking at Ivy; she didn't want to admit she'd stolen Ivy's files and had been rather worried about her. Ivy probably wouldn't believe that Carmen cared what happened to her, particularly not after last night. "That's why; Zack's just not enough of a challenge on his own, and he and Derry lately spend most of their time fighting." C.S. shot between her legs and chased the paper wad out into the hallway. "Great. So you blacken my name and probably cause my parents and relatives to have hysterics, just because you want me to come back and make theft fun again? Are you sure you weren't going to blackmail me into working for you?" Ivy said, disbelievingly. Carmen had gone through all that just because Zack wasn't a challenge on his own? Just to get her back on the chase? Maybe she was just another challenge, despite what Carmen claimed. Carmen sighed, and bit the bullet. "Ivy, I ... was worried about you. You were acting so strange, I didn't even recognize you at first. That was the only way I could think of to flush you out of hiding ... try to shock you back to being yourself. I'm sorry. It was not one of my better plans." That said, she added on a lighter note, "Though I certainly wouldn't mind if you joined me..." "Carmen! How could you?! It was bad enough that you made us think Ivy went bad, don't stand there and talk her into it!" "I'm sitting, Chief." "Ok, don't sit there and talk her into going bad!" Ivy shook her head. "I'm not going bad, Chief! Sorry, Carmen, but I don't think so." It sounded as if Carmen cared about her. Cared enough to take the chance Ivy would denounce her to try to help. Her picture of Carmen wavered, and shifted; maybe she'd been telling the truth last night. Maybe this wasn't all Carmen's latest game. She had apologized ... Carmen apologizing? Maybe she just hadn't woken up yet. She shrugged. "It was a thought. And are you sure your relatives were having hysterics?" Ivy rolled her eyes. "If they weren't, I'm going to be surprised." Her mother had had hysterics at the hospital, furious about her letting Zack get her. She hadn't said much about Ivy's own injuries, but that wasn't surprising; they weren't nearly as vivid as Zack's. C.S. shot back into the room, and meowed. "Eeek!" The Chief shot back up into the sanctuary of the ceiling. C.S. lapped up water and wandered back out again. Carmen got up to check on the turkey. "Well, you're going to have to do something, Ivy." "I've been doing something," she protested, deliberately misunderstanding. "I read Tarot cards, cast horoscopes, teach martial arts... I've been doing plenty. And you ruined my first business." "Yes, I remember the reading you gave me," Carmen said dryly. Ivy laughed. "I brought the cards with me ..." "That wasn't, however, what I meant," she said, sliding the oven rack back in and closing the door. "Ivy, what you did to Lee was a temporary aberration." "Doesn't matter," Ivy replied, all the humor vanishing, revealing the pain underneath. It hadn't really faded after all; she had just grown accustomed to it. "It doesn't matter, Carmen. I still did it." Was this why Carmen had invited her here? To pour salt on her wounds? Every time she thought she understood, the thief confused her again. "Ivy, it does matter," she said, sitting down next to her. "You've been running away from it for months; isn't it time you faced it?" Ivy laughed, a curious brittle edge to the sound. "How can I run away from it, when it's there almost every time I close my eyes? It's only since I started teaching with Adam that the nightmares don't come every night. Carmen, I can't go back. Don't ask me to." "You can come back," the Chief said gently. "Ivy, you've punished yourself beyond what anyone else would have. It isn't going to happen again." "It doesn't need to!" Ivy said, feeling her heart break again. "It doesn't need to!" Carmen wished she wasn't doing this, the pain in Ivy's voice was terrible. But if she didn't make her face it, Ivy would destroy herself, effectively if not literally; everything that made Ivy herself was already starting to crack under the strain. "You can't hide forever. The nightmares won't go away until you face it." She put an arm around Ivy's shoulders. "I have to face it in my nightmares," Ivy whispered, tense, staring at her closed fists rather than looking at anyone. Carmen shook her head, feeling the wrench of sympathy. "You know that isn't helping, Ivy. It's only making it worse. The Chief and I will help you." Ivy shook her head, staring helplessly at the Chief. "Chief..." "Please, Ivy ... I didn't think I'd ever say this, but let Carmen help you." She shuddered, going numb, and then nodded, once, slowly, never looking up. "Let's go somewhere more comfortable," Carmen said, and led them into a parlor. She relit the fire, and the cheery light filled the small room. Ivy sat stiffly in a well-padded antique chair, not looking at either of them; Carmen pulled another chair over to be able to look at her. The Chief hovered by the fire. She and the Chief had decided to try to hypnotise Ivy to get her to look at what happened; it took a long time, longer than Carmen would have expected, to get Ivy eased down into trance. "Ivy, can you hear me?" "Yes," Ivy whispered. "Ivy, we're going to start going back. You are going back in time ... November, October, September, August, July, June, May, April. It's the sixteenth of April. You will see the events of that day as if you are watching them on a video player; you can stop the tape, speed up, or slow it down, just as you want. They are not happening to you now; it is like watching a movie. Now, let the tape play. Where are you?" "Acme. I'm playing chess with the Chief and losing. Again," Ivy said, the exasperation in her voice clear. Ivy hated to lose. "What time is it?" "About noon. I wonder what the cafeteria is serving for lunch. I hope it's not chicken again, that's all they've served for weeks. A report comes in; Lee Jordan just broke out of jail again. Zack and I spend all afternoon trying to get a fix on his location." "Fast forward to that evening, Ivy." "It's about six. Zack went to dinner with some friends. I'm working on finding Lee; the cafeteria sent me up a tray of stroganoff. We get a report that Lee just stole a valuable book by Thomas Jefferson from the University of Virginia. I find Zack and we C5 there." She stopped, frowning. "Lee is getting away. I kicked the book out of his hands, but it lands on the porch roof. Zack gets it back, but he nearly falls over; I haul him back and we go chasing after Lee. Zack is slow, he's tired, we've had too many late nights lately. Maybe I should have come on my own instead, given him a break. He falls behind me; Lee gets out, he's getting away!" Ivy said, her frustration rising. "Ivy, let it go. You're only watching. This isn't happening now." Ivy's breath slowed again. "I tackle Lee, bring him down. We're fighting, I'm trying to get the cuffs on him. He hits me pretty hard a couple times, then I'm trying to take himd down to make him stop resisting. He pulls a knife ... " Ivy's face twisted with remembered pain. "It hurts! I let go of him, my leg hurts, he's cut me. He grabs me, takes the book back, knocks me backward. Zack yells something, he's just coming out." Her breath was growing ragged again. "Ivy, stop there. It's all right. You're not actually there. Let it go, you're only watching." Ivy shuddered, then slowly calmed. "All right. Start the tape again." "I'm trying to get up. Zack's running forward. Lee throws something. Zack! Get out! It's a grenade!" Ivy was shaking, and Carmen's attempts to calm her were only partially successful. "He tries to run, but he doesn't make it. The portico falls on top of him!" She started crying, and nothing Carmen said calmed her this time. "Zack! I dig him back out of the rubble. Lee is going to pay for this. He's going to pay for this if it's the last thing I do! Zack's hurt. We get him to a hospital. They stitch up my leg while they work on him. They don't know if he's going to recover. I leave my badge and communicator. Mom and Dad are furious. They only let him join Acme since I was there to protect him ... and I didn't." She stopped. "I didn't protect him," she said brokenly. Carmen stopped her there, and managed to get her calmed down, coming to the conclusion she would not particularly like Ivy's parents. "Ivy, you're not there. You're only watching." "I lied to the Chief ... he's going to be hurt, but I promised Zack Lee would pay for this," Ivy went on. The Chief shook his head, looking sad. "I follow Lee for hours, but I have to rest. Everything hurts. I put tracers on his car. I dream ... oh, God, don't let Zack die. My head hurts, it's hard to think, it's hard to move. Carmen's there when I get back on the trail," Ivy said, puzzled. "What's she doing here? I don't have time for her. She's trying to talk me out of this? I get back in the car and get on the trail. Lee's headed for Washington. I trail him to the Smithsonian." She stopped. "Carmen again? What does she want? I go past her after Lee." Ivy's face twisted in a deadly mix of pain and anger; Carmen could only partially calm her this time. "My leg hurts more and more, but everything is soaked with blood, Lee's hands are covered in blood, my hands are bloody, everything's bloody. He's breaking into the case. I knock him down, he kicks me, something cracks, but I hit him, he falls, and I keep hitting him and hitting him, I can't stop. Everything's bloody. There's blood everywhere. He's unconscious, he can't get away, but I keep hitting him until someone pulls me away. It's Carmen, she won't let me hit him again, and then suddenly everything changes. The only blood is on my hands and Lee's face. Blood on my hands... What have I done?" Her hands were clenched into fists, her nails drawing blood, and her face was stamnped with heartbreaking pain and horror. Tears slipped down her face. "Carmen had to stop me," she said, bewildered and confused. "She stopped me, but she doesn't say anything. She sounds worried about me." "Ivy, stop. You're only watching. It's not happening now." Ivy calmed slowly down. "Fast forward to the next day," Carmen said. "You're in the hospital." Ivy's voice changed to the vaguely disconnected sound of someone on painkillers. "My entire body hurt. The pills took away most of the pain. Mom and Dad are here. No change on Zack. I was supposed to protect him. They don't think they should have let us join Acme. Gia chases them out and sits with me. I can't tell when I doze off and when I wake up. Someone from Acme's always there. They cut back on the painkillers the next day." her voice changed again, still a little disconnected, but clearer. "Mom and Dad again. They heard about what I did to Lee; Dad's angry, he thinks he taught me better than that. Mom's upset I'm hurt, she thought I could take better care of myself, she's shocked at what I did. We fight. I can't think clearly, everything's starting to hurt, the painkiller's wearing off. They're angry about everything. Gia and Armando chase them out and stay with me. Dr. Armstrong comes in and wants to talk." "Ivy, stop the tape. When I reach one, you will be distanced from the events. You will be able to look at them and see them clearly. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Ivy, you are distanced from the events. How do you feel now?" "He hurt Zack," Ivy said, wearily. "I was supposed to protect him, and I didn't. I failed." "Does Zack think so?" "I don't know. Our parents think so. They were so angry; I shouldn't have let him get hurt. There must have been something I could have done." Carmen was convinced she would not like Ivy's parents. "Ivy, there was nothing you could have done. There was no way you could have known what Lee was going to do; he had already wounded you." "I could have knocked him out of the way." "Ivy, you wouldn't have made it. You would only have been hurt too. And if you had been, you wouldn't have gotten him to the hospital as fast. That made a lot of difference, maybe the essential difference." Ivy was silent. "It did?" The Chief spoke. "It did. A few minutes later could have made all the difference." "Chief, I failed you," she said. "Acme agents aren't supposed to be violent. I lied to you, I broke every rule in the book." "Ivy, I don't think you failed," the Chief said. "I forgive you for lying to me. You weren't yourself." "I failed myself. I lost control," Ivy said, finally. "I became everything I never wanted to be!" "It doesn't have to be permanent, Ivy," Carmen said. "You can come back and start again; you can prevent yourself doing it again. You've never hurt anyone since. You're still one of Acme's finest. You're still yourself, Ivy." "I would have killed him." "You didn't," Carmen said. "It's over. Let the guilt go, Ivy. It's a poisonous snake, striking you harder the more you cling to it." Ivy's hands started to loosen, a bewildered, half-frightened look. "But I nearly killed him. I let Zack get hurt." "Zack never blamed you," the Chief said. "He never thought it was your fault, Ivy. It was never your fault." Ivy's hands relaxed further. "But I would have killed Lee if Carmen hadn't stopped me. Even she must have been disgusted." "I was not," Carmen said. "I was scared for you. Your partner was in critical condition, you were injured yourself, and you weren't thinking clearly. Ivy, you frustrate me, confuse me, amuse me, steal my loot back and ruin my plans, but you have never disgusted me. You are one of my favorite people, even if you are my opponent." "Ivy, I forgive you," the Chief said. "I forgive you for lying to me, for beating Lee, for disappearing for all this time. I forgive you for everything. Please, Ivy. Forgive yourself." "Let go of the snake, Ivy. It will destroy you if you don't let go of it," Carmen urged. "Let it go. Forgive yourself. Nothing is irreparable." Ivy's hands relaxed completely, and the tension seeped out of her body. "That's right. The snake is gone, Ivy. The memory is there, but the poison is gone. Let the pain go; now that the snake is gone, the pain is fading away." Ivy relaxed further. "That's right. You are relaxed, floating. Nothing can trouble you here." Ivy smiled drowsily. "S'nice. It's quiet here. Like a cathedral." "What do you truly want to do?" "Go back to Acme," Ivy whispered. "Come home, Ivy. We're waiting," the Chief whispered. Ivy smiled. "All right, Chief. I'll be back." Carmen gently guided Ivy from trance into sleep, setting a suggestion that she would remember everything that had happened after a refreshing sleep. She set a pillow under Ivy's head, then put a light blanket over her. She looked up at the Chief, eyes damp; she brushed at them. "I think we did it." "You did it," the Chief said, no rancor in his voice. "You gave me back one of my two best detectives." Carmen shook her head. "Let's get out of here and let her sleep." They retreated to the kitchen. "Thank you, Carmen," the Chief said softly. She smiled. "You're welcome, Chief. Chess?" They played and talked for several hours while the turkey cooked. Ivy woke up slowly, vague hints of pleasant dreams drifting out of her memory. C.S. was curled up on her lap, asleep. She remembered Carmen's voice, distant and far. She remembered a snake ... it all returned to her. She probed the memories, expecting pain; they hurt, but not with the corrosive pain of the last several months. She still had to explain to Zack what had happened, and wasn't looking forward to it; he was probably furious with her by now. She picked up C.S., who meowed until Ivy settled her in one arm, then folded the blanket and put the pillow down on top of it. She washed her face and rinsed out her mouth, and went to help Carmen with dinner, still rather stunned at the idea of sharing Thanksgiving with the thief. But she had just given Ivy back the only thing she could remember wanting for her entire life. For that, for an old scrapbook gathering dust in the attic, she could forget Carmen was a thief for at least one day. Epilogue Zack came back to Acme on Monday morning, not really looking forward to the week. He found a message saying that Derry had been reassigned, and that his partner would be arriving about nine am; he hurried, since it was already 8:50. Traffic had been bad on the way in. The Chief was in a surprisingly good mood, whistling cheerfully. "Good morning, Zack!" he said brightly. "Have a good Thanksgiving?" "No," Zack grumped. "I got outfought for the turkey, the chairs and almost the pumpkin pie. Ivy didn't show up, Mom sulked, and Aunt Mary went on and on about how that was all she could expect." He heard the C-5 corridor open up behind him. "And now I come in and find out you assigned me yet another partner without bothering to tell me." "You'll like her, Zack. I'm positive," the Chief said, grinning. Someone landed just as he said, "Yeah, that's what you said about Derry, too. Just stick me in the computer lab, Chief. It'll be easier on everybody." The C-5 portal closed. "Little bro?" someone asked from behind him. "You speaking to me?" Zack fell out of his chair, then scrambled to his feet, staring. "Ivy!" he shouted, running across the room. She set down her bags and a cat carrier. "Zack!" Zack yanked her hair to make sure it wasn't yet another trick of Carmen's, then gave her a hug that nearly cracked her ribs. "Oof!" Ivy gasped, hugging back. "I guess you're recovered, all right." "Where have you been?!" he demanded, the knot overwhelmed by sheer relief. "You're back to stay, right?" "It's a long story, little bro," Ivy said, tousling his hair. "And I am back to stay." She looked up at the Chief, and smiled.