IVY’S REALLY BAD DAY
      by Charles Gray

	Ivy was having a miserable day.  Not figuratively, as when Carmen
left her and Zack looking like idiots, but literally, as her cold moved into
its second week.  Zack was off with Jasmine,  trying to track down Carmen’s
latest caper, leaving her to get better on her own.  She dressed and went to
ACME headquarters, figuring that she might as well bemiserable there, as at
home.
	"Ivy Ivy, Ivy!"  The Chief popped up, "dedication is one thing, but
giving your cold to the Entire Acme agency is quite another.  What are you
doing here?"  Ivy plopped into the chair, opened her mouth to say something,
and was caught by a sneezing fit.
	"Since Zack and Jasmine are looking for Carmen, I’d hoped I could 
clear up some of these robberies that her henchmen have been pulling.  And 
you," she continued, pointing at the chief.   "Can’t get my cold, so no 
complaining."
	"Well my ill detective,  Carmen’s henchmen, including Sara Bellum 
have been stealing just about every type of electronic component you care to
mention, from Cape Canaveral, to Science City, in Japan."
	"Could she be building another Chrono-skimmer?"  Ivy asked, leaning
forward and shuddering.  Her last trip through time had almost been her 
last, courtesy of a very sharp trident.
	"Maybe,"  the Chief replied, "But the software only exists at ACME,
and there’s been no break ins."
	Ivy was about to reply, when a voice interrupted them.
	"Had been no break ins, now, Chief."  Carmen said, strolling into 
the command center with her henchmen in tow.  "Ivy, what a pleasant 
surprise.  I thought you’d be in bed."  Ivy quickly go up, but this time 
Carmen’s henchmen were taking no chances, as a netgun pinned her to the 
floor.  Carmen walked over to the main console and attached a data probe.
	"This stuff, isn’t like you, Carmen."  Ivy said, trying to free 
herself from the net. "No clues?"  Carmen finished the download, after 
silencing the Chief, and began to transfer the data.
	"Sorry detective,  The clues will come after I’ve made my little 
trip."  she said, punching in commands.  Ivy began to feel the net give, and
gathered herself for a leap, aiming for the chrono unit it Carmen’s hand.  
The vortex began to open.
	"Not this time, Carmen!"  Ivy shouted, coming up and knocking the 
unit out of Carmen’s hand.  "The police will be here any second.  Sloppy 
Carmen, but thanks for cheering up my day."
	"Ah, detective,"  Carmen began.  
	"Yes,"  Ivy said, smiling broadly, 
	"Look behind you."
`	"Oh right!  you really expect me to-"  Ivy’s feet left the floor, 
and a powerful force pulled her up and back, along with Carmen, the 
Chrono-unit, and a fair amount of junk.  "Hey!"  Ivy cried out, as she 
looked over her shoulder at the still growing vortex.  It was different, 
then the other ones, though, she thought.  This time, it was larger, redder,
and somehow... deformed.  Then there was no time for thought, as Ivy and 
Carmen were pulled through, as a bright flash signaled the end of the 
vortex.
***
	It was cold,  more then that, it was freezing.  Ivy thought.  She 
had no idea where Carmen had vanished too, but she knew that she was a long
way from Acme where it had been a warm afternoon.  Here, the night sky was 
almost completely covered in clouds, and the snow, whipped into flurries by
the icy wind had already dusted her hair and jacket in white.  Worst of all, 
Ivy didn’t recognize the area well enough to figure out what country she was
in, much less how to get to a city.  Still, it looked like the path where 
she had landed was fairly well traveled, and it had to go somewhere.  
	"Not much of a choice, though"  she thought, wrapping her arms 
around herself, trying to stop the heat from leaking out of her inadequate 
jacket and pants.  She mentally flipped a coin, came up tails, and began to
walk down  the road the way the coin had come up, head down against the 
wind.
	Ivy managed to walk nearly a half mile before the wind picked up,
and the snowfall increased, filling in her footprints behind her.  Every 
step became a struggle against the wind, and the cold that weighted down her
limbs.
	"I. Am.  Going.  To.  Kill.  Carmen."  She chanted, timing each word
to a step.  That kept her going for another 100 yards or so.  Then the 
ground came up and punched her in the nose.  She thought about getting up 
again, but the ground was actually quite comfortable.  She’d just closer 
her eyes for one minute, then keep going.

	"Do you see that, James?",  Tomson asked.  James, busy trying to 
keep the runabout somewhere in the vicinity of the road they were supposed 
to be traveling., said nothing for a moment.
	"Yes, Tomson, I see perfectly.  I see the windshield, and the 
covering of ice over it.  I also see the absolute idiocy of traveling in the 
worst storm in the past 20 years to hit Japan,  especially in the 
countryside where no one will understand English to help us if the bloody
runabout ends up in a ditch.  Is that what you were referring to?"
	"No, old chap, look there, by the side of the road."  He said, 
pointing.  "Isn’t that someone lying down?"
	"Hell.  you’re right.  Probably some poor villager who got lost.  
Come on, lets see if he’s still alive."  James said,  idling the car and 
opening the steam vents.  The two men got out of the steamer,  both dressed
in jackets over the formal cloths that marked them as members of the 
Imperial British legation to Japan.  James flipped the body over, then
exclaimed.
	"Bloody hell, it’s an Englishwoman!"  
	"What outlandish cloths.  Is she alive?"
	James touched her icy throat..  The fluttery pulse was barely 
detectable.  
	"Yes, but not for long in this cold.  We’d best get her back to the
embassy.  Come on now,"  He said, taking the woman under the arms, as Tomson
grabbed her legs, manhandling her into the back of the steamer.  "Heavy, 
isn’t she?"
	"Strong too, I’d wager, but what the devil is she doing here?"  
Tomson said, taking off his coat and laying it over her, as he and James got
back into the car.
	"I don’t know, but I do know that we’ve issued no passport for 
someone of her description.  Tch."  He finished.
	"What’s wrong?"  James asked.
	"The ambassador doesn’t like surprises.  Especially with what’s 
going on, I don’t think he’s going to be overly grateful for our little 
inconsistency."  He finished, putting the car in gear and turning around, 
going back the way they had come.

	The next morning, as the sun tried to (unsuccessfully) cut through 
the sullen clouds,  James and Tomson were both at a meeting they would have
rather avoided.  The Right Honorable Edward McKenna, KVC, VC and by his 
Majesty’s grace, ambassador to the court of the Emperor of Japan, looked at
his two underlings.
	"Gentlemen.  I asked you to take a drive, get lost, and then show up
at the Ishigawa shipyard asking for directions.  I wanted pictures to see if
the Japanese are building any more Battleships.  Not a girl who has come 
into their country illegally, given me a headache, and is a complete mystery
to boot."  He finished, bringing the flat of his hand down on the desk, 
punctuating his statement with a crack.  "Her cloths are outlandish, the 
identification we found on her makes absolutely no sense, and to top it off,
there are several... devices with her that have had Dr. Tomkins going 
quietly insane."
	"So, she is not British?"  James said.
	"If we are to believe the things we’ve found,  she’s not even from
our earth."
	"That’s ridiculous!"  Tomson said.
	"Well, it might be-"  Sir Mckenna paused at a tone on the deskphone.
He picked it up.  "Yes?"  He asked, in a tone that boded ill for the person
on the other end.  "He is? Oh, He is.  I see.  Send him in then, 
immediately."  He turned to the two men.  "It appears that our opposite 
numbers in Japanese Imperial Intelligence are rather more in the know
then we had thought."  The door opened, and a secretary ushered in a young 
Japanese man, dressed in a suit.
	"Ah Hiroki!"  McKenna smiled, all signs of  irritation vanished.  
"How is your father?"
	"Disturbed, Sir McKenna."  Hiroki replied.  "He had heard the 
undoubtedly false rumor that you had allowed one of England’s beauty’s to 
grace our humble isle without allowing him the honor of conveying the 
Empire's greetings.  I of course, know that you would never do such a 
thing."
	"Well, I fear that your father is partially correct."  Hiroki raised
his eyebrows at this.  "You see, a British national did arrive unannounced,
but there was no intention to deceive the empire.  The woman in question is
James’ new fiancee, and as such, she asked us to surprise him.  I’m afraid,
that someone must not have realized that they didn’t need to surprise you 
too..."  McKenna spread his hands in a self depreciating gesture.
	"I see,"  Hiroki mused.  "I was not aware that you were engaged. 
Colonel Church."  
	"It was ahhh, a sudden affair"  James finished, choking out the 
words, considering all the awful ways he could use to put his boss to death.
"In fact, her appearance caught me rather by surprise."
	"Well, then it is good that I’m here to invite you to a party to be
held at the Imperial Palace 2 days hence.  I simply must Insist on a chance
to see the future wife of such a skilled British officer."  He smiled, bowed
to them, and then left.
	"He knows she isn’t my fiancee."
	"True,"  McKenna said, "but he’ll play along for the sake of 
appearances. Wouldn’t do to clutter up the great game with awkward moments.
Besides, forcing you to attend the party with the young lady will give him 
ample opportunity to.... embarrass us."  He paused.  "Well,  Colonel Church,
you must be about your business."
	"Business sir?"  James asked, hoping that he wasn’t going to hear 
what he knew McKenna would say.
	"Why, getting to know your fiancee, of course.  It wouldn’t do to 
be seen consulting a pad of paper whenever anyone asks you her name, now 
would it."
	"No sir,"  James said, wondering if the day could get any worse.